If you share your mistakes with people, they will stop appreciating you.
People who believe that they are the masters of their lives are often mistaken. What happens to us depends not only on us, but also on those around us. They are able to influence our lives with their actions, words and even thoughts.
Some people are too outspoken to hide their lives from others. They tell others not only about their successes, but also about their problems. But many psychologists believe that you should not share your mistakes with people, as their attitude towards you will worsen.
People need comfort
From time to time, each of us needs support and encouragement. Even strong and influential people sometimes want to hear words of comfort. This is normal, because in this way we let go of the negative, “discharge”.
If you feel that you want to tell your friends or acquaintances about your problems, then stop and think. Try to understand what you want to achieve by this: to hear words of comfort, to receive advice, etc. Also think about whether you really need it. You may be able to talk frankly and even feel better, but the attitude of a friend or acquaintance towards you is likely to deteriorate. Yes, the interlocutor will not show, sympathize, support, especially if he is a tactful, well-mannered person. But after such a conversation, you will feel that a chill breathed from him.
Here it is important to understand why this is happening. After your story, an acquaintance will pity you, which is bad. The fact is that on a subconscious level, people try to stay away from losers, despise them. Therefore, after a sincere conversation, your relationship will deteriorate, as your acquaintance will avoid you.
Don’t talk about mistakes
After your revelation, a friend will perceive you as a weak person. In his subconscious, you will become stronger in the image of a victim, the weakness of which you took advantage of. He will believe that if this happened once, then it will definitely happen again. Even if the interlocutor pretends to support you, he will believe that you yourself are to blame for the problems. But he will not admit it, but will simply give neutral advice.
If you are in the habit of telling your friends about your mistakes, then be prepared for the fact that they will soon stop communicating with you. This is due to the fact that a person is always drawn to those who are stronger and more successful than him.
For example, you told a friend that money was stolen from you. She will listen to you, sympathize, perhaps give advice. But after the conversation, he will begin to perceive you as a loser, an unreliable person with whom you should not do business (borrow money or do business together). Therefore, you should not do this, otherwise you will program yourself for similar problems in the future. This thought will certainly be supported by a friend’s negative opinion of you, which she did not voice.
If the trouble happened, then it is better to remain silent, try not to spread. Stop running negative thoughts in your head, take your mind off them, it will be much more effective.
If you are used to constantly discussing your problems with others, then immediately get rid of this tendency. The fact is that negative experience accumulates in the subconscious of a person, which greatly pollutes it. Then he himself begins to perceive himself as a failure, and the likelihood of repeated mistakes increases.
Who can I complain about my problems
In general, psychologists advise against talking about your failures. It is enough to draw the right conclusions, remember the lesson, and let go of the situation. Do not get used to complaining about life, otherwise negativity will accumulate in it, which destroys all plans even at the stage of their preparation.
But if you really want to speak out or get advice, then do not talk about the problem in front of strangers. Others can grasp the essence of the conversation, and influence you with their negative energy, then the failure is likely to happen again. In addition, there may be a person among the listeners who wants to take advantage of your weakness, deceive, use to achieve their goals.
Remember that the habit of complaining is a direct path to self-destruction. Better not to talk about your problems. But if it hurts or you need advice, then contact your closest and trusted people. Don’t let others negatively influence your life. After making mistakes, make the right conclusions, and try not to repeat them.